Looong story..Lets see if I can Make it Short....

I dont know all the facts about the beginning of my life..My mom and my dad and my older sister ALL have different stories...So this is what I believe happened. Let me start off by saying my dad is a bad alcoholic. My mom is..well crazy. Anyways..My sister and I have the same mom but different dad.. She didnt know her dad growing up, my dad was the only one she was close with. So when i was born my mom, dad, and sister all lived in Mountain Home Idaho. My dad was in the USAF. When I was 2 or 3 my dad got new orders to Anchorage, AK. My mom didnt want to go with him because he always was drinking and kicking us out of the house..(I dont know if that is true or not) So my mom and dad divorced and he went to AK and my mom, sister, and I stayed in MH. When I was about 4 my sister and I went to go live with my dad..My mom will tell you it was a mutual decision between the two of them..but i believe that Social Services told my mom they would put me in foster care unless I went to live with my dad because she wasnt taking care of me..she would leave me alone with my 13 year old sister, while she went out and did drugs and drink..My sister came to AK with me she was only supposed to stay a summer but decided to go to school that year too. She was getting into a lot of trouble so she went back to my moms.. I remember talking to my mom for a little while on the phone after my sister left but after awhile the calls stopped and the cards in the mail stopped and I didnt talk to my mom anymore..meanwhile I was being raised by my step mom Teresa. My dad was always gone at the bar and when he was home he was drunk also..I dont remember very many sober moments with him..Teresa and my dad now have 3 kids. Jacob who is 15 and the twins hanna and tucker who are 10. They divorced when i was in 7th grade. Teresa and I had a love hate relationship..she loved me i think but because i was my dads kid and my dad cheated on her and treated her bad and was never home she took it out on me..she smacked me around a lot and when jacob was born it got worse..I was always grounded..and the kids at school made fun of me ALL the time because i was never aloud to do anything or do my hair the way i wanted or anything. When the twins were born thats when the divorce started to take place. teresa caught my dad cheating..The summer after 7th grade a big fight broke out between teresa and her sister..my aunt told me that my mom called the house looking for me and then i asked teresa why she didnt tell me about it.. she wanted me to tell her who told me..so i did and she called me a liar..then my aunt came over and said yes i told her and my aunt took me and left for a few hours..next thing i know i am getting screamed at by teresa that the divorce was my fault and she hated me and that i needed to pack ONE bag and go with my dad..so i did. then the next day he had me on a plane to Nevada with my great aunt. During that time i was contacted by my mom there. She kinda bribed me to go live with her and I did.. (she was in Medical Lake Washington her husband was in the AF there) she was cool for maybe a month but then she turned into this crazy person who blamed everything on everyone else..she let me do what i wanted whenever i wanted..i was dating older guys ..in high school when i was in junior high..I wasnt having REAL sex with them..just oral and other stuff like that.. she caught me one time because i wrote in my diary about sneaking out of my house and what not..she lost it and tried to punish me but i walked all over her.. she was wishy washy..and i knew i could play her.. during this time i had started to talk to teresa again because she had the kids..I LOVE those kids with every part of me.. so i had to be civil with her. I dont know where my dad was at the time..not with her i know that. She apologized for everything.. and told me the truth about why she didnt let me talk to my mom for 10 years..her and I now are SO incredibly close. she raised me. she is who i consider to be my MOM. My real mom is just the person who gave birth to me... The middle of my freshman year my moms husband got orders to Fairbanks AK..how ironic i would end up back in AK.. I was there until I was 17...when my adult life began...In my next blog i will write about my Husband and how we met and my kids. Sorry if this all makes no scents..I am trying to put it all out but its hard because there are so many details..Ask any Questions i will answer ANY of them ;) thanks to the few of you that are reading..

-Lindsey